“Change is not something that we should fear. Rather, it is something that we should welcome. For without change, nothing in this world would ever grow or blossom, and no one in this world would ever move forward to become the person they’re meant to be.” ~Unknown
Why do so many people fear change instead of welcoming it? We tend to get into a routine and become quite comfortable with things. After a while, it is easy to develop a false sense of security. It feels safe because we know we to expect. It’s easy to become comfortably numb. We resist change and close out creativity.
If we are not changing, we are not creating our lives. Imagine if nothing changed in your life from this day forward. Everything would remain the same. Creativity would seize. In a sense, we would be alive, but not living. Would you be satisfied? Would you have any regrets? What comes up for you?
Whether you realize it or not, you play a part in creating each day. It begins with creating an intention, attitude or outlook. Conscious or subconscious, it’s there. It could be based in fear or love. Be mindful of your thoughts.
What are you creating?
- Smile and laugh as often as possible. They are the ultimate anti-depressants and don’t cost a thing.
- Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
- Focus on the positive. Invest your energy on good thoughts, positive people and what vibrates at a high level of energy. (Avoid energy vampires.)
- Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and less manufactured food.
- Make time to do the things that bring you joy and fulfillment. (Coloring, writing, singing, dancing, drawing, scrap booking, painting, playing an instrument, etc…)
- Disconnect from all electronics and connect with nature 15 minutes a day.
- Take responsibility for your own happiness. It is not up to anyone else.
- Spend time with people under the age of 5 and over the age of 65.
- Drink plenty of water. Stay hydrated.
- Practice meditation and affirmations on a regular basis.
- Clear clutter from your home, your office and your car to make space for fresh new and flowing energy in your life.
- Let it go. Life is too short to hold onto resentments or waste time hating anyone. Forgive and release everything! You will feel lighter.
- Do at least one activity a day that gets your body moving. Take a walk. Go running. Hike. Hit the gym. Keep it moving.
- Be kind to yourself. (Would you treat others the same way you treat yourself?)
- Agree to disagree. You don’t have to win every argument.
- Stop comparing your life to other peoples’ lives. Comparison robs us of our joy.
- Prepare for your situation to change, good or bad. Change is constant.
- Stay in touch with your friends and family. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
- Do the right thing for the right reasons. (Check your motives before taking action.)
- Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed. Be grateful instead of hateful.
- Be of Service. Give back. Volunteer. Help someone. It is beyond fulfilling.
I only had two sips of my morning coffee before I attempted to get out of the car. I was holding my keys in one hand and a couple of bags on my shoulder. I opened the door to get out and the coffee slipped out of my hand and bounced across my legs and in the air before I could regain control of my cup. (Luckily it was a recyclable to go cup with a lid.). When the coffee incident was over, I had HUGE spots of coffee on my jeans, shirt, and car seat. What a mess! My immediate reaction was to laugh. Yep, I laughed over spilled coffee.
It got me thinking about how much I’ve changed. A few years ago, my reaction would have been very different. I would have been so mad at myself for spilling the coffee and angry at everyone in my path the rest of the morning. It was hard for me to let things go back then. I could turn a small thing like spilling coffee into such a big deal. But over the years, I’ve learned how to keep things right-sized in my life. Getting upset does not serve me. Instead, I can laugh it off, say “oops” and move on. What a feeling!
How we react to things is a good way to recognize where we are on the barometer of life. If I hadn’t spilled the coffee on myself this morning, then I would not have noticed my reaction. Maybe it wasn’t an accident after all. Maybe it was the universe sending me a Jav-A-Ha moment.
At times, we all get stuck driving up and down the same path of thoughts in our mind. This can lead to feelings of frustration, anxiety, numbness and sadness. Some of us stay stuck in this traffic of the mind way too long. Whether it’s the freeway of fear, the side street of self pity, the road of relationships or an alternate route, we become trapped. How do we find the detour to break free? Freedom comes from awareness, letting go and moving forward.
The first step towards personal freedom and getting unstuck is to gain a true awareness. Is there an area of your life that you feel stuck in? Take some time to really think about it. Some examples are feeling stuck in a dead-end job, relationship, financial debt, unhealthy habits, resentment, the past and fear. It might be difficult to step back and become aware of it right away. Especially if you have gotten used to the repetitive cycle of unhealthy thought, feelings and patterns.
Once you become aware of what is keeping you stuck, you can begin the process of letting go of the illusion. The reality is that staying stuck is a choice. It might feel like there are no other options or ways to break free, but there are. Let go of the false beliefs and fear. It is time to take a detour to a new path of thoughts in your mind. Change your outlook and you will see endless roads of possibilities.
Letting go can lead to a shift in the way you feel about what kept you stuck. That is the freedom that can be found from letting go. Embrace it. Now you’re ready to move forward. The mind traffic is no longer there. Nothing is holding you back. You are free and can move forward on whatever path you chose to take. Stay aware and you are less likely to get stuck in any mind traffic. You have discovered the detour to personal freedom and are moving forward.
Every other advertisement on the TV, radio, internet and more seems to be promoting all of the back to school items. The media bombardment has begun! It has been years since I graduated from college. Yet I can still remember switching my mental gears from “summer” to “back to school.” It was a time to prepare, organize and focus for the new school year ahead. There were new classes to experience, new people to meet and new opportunities to discover, learn and grow from. Those of us that are done with the back to school days can use this time to reflect upon the things that we need and want to go back to. Wondering what I mean? Below are some examples:
Back to Goals: How are those New Year’s resolutions coming along? Remember those? One of my resolutions was to get back into an exercise routine. So like the rest of America, I went back to the gym once the new year hit. It was going great for a couple months. Then it stopped. Hmmmm…As I write this, I am committing to myself to go back to my goal of exercising on a regular basis. I will make it a reality starting this week! What goals would you like to get back to?
Back to Dreams: Anything is possible. We all had childhood dreams of what we wanted to be and where we wanted to go in life. What were some of your dreams? Have you followed any of them? When I was younger, I dreamed about being able to fly and have superhero powers. A couple years ago, I went skydiving. It was amazing! I’m still working on the superhero powers and will keep you posted. My point is that it is never too late to make some of those dreams come true.
Back to your Authentic Self: Do you look in the mirror and not recognize the person you have become? Is your true self hidden behind layers, walls and masks you have used over the years to fit in and feel accepted? Now might be a good time to go back to your true authentic self.
All of these thoughts started from the back to school commercials. I wonder what will happen when the Thanksgiving commercials start (wink, wink.)
Author: Hiram Oconnor
More often than I care to admit, I bump into a problem that shakes the very core of my being and challenges the heart of my belief system. At such times, I feel the world closing in around me and a tendency toward desperation begins to raise its ugly head. My first impulse is to fight back, to attack the attacker, to react by either running from or toward the problem.
But I do not follow my first impulse any longer. I now stand back and look at the problem for a while. I observe it from different points of view, all the while realizing that I am not the problem but that the problem is just an indication of a small adjustment I have to make in my thinking.
No problem is bigger and more powerful than we are. We are all children of the Infinite. The Universe is biased on our side. We have within us untapped strength and wisdom to deal with all challenges that come our way.
All problems have within them the seeds of their solution. We must learn to listen to the Silence, to hear the instructions from within and to follow the “still small voice.” Life whispers to us all the time. It tells us to go this way or that, to take this road or the other. When we are frightened by what appears to be major problems, we block the “still, small voice” from our consciousness and only hear the howling winds and the thunder of the storm.
Find a quiet spot in the middle of the turbulence. Go to a quiet place within your soul and stay there for a short while. Do not rant and rave at the problem. Just go to this spot and let your fears be calmed, even for a moment. Don’t listen to the call of the problem but, rather, listen for a few seconds to the song of your soul.
I often say that it’s not what’s happening around you that causes anxiety, but what you think about what’s happening around you. Remove your thoughts from the problem for a short while. Don’t try NOT to think about the problem. That doesn’t work. Just remove your focus from the problem and think of something else. With a little practice, it becomes second nature.
Know that you’re bigger and stronger than anything that seems to annoy you. Look away, for a short while, from your problem and know that its solution is coming to you. Trust the force that created you and placed you in this part of the universe. Trust the process that has sustained you until now. Let go of the problem. Remember that it is not the problem that’s holding on to you, but that it’s you who are holding on to it.
Let it go. Don’t be like the man who was frantically rowing away from shore while his boat was firmly tied to the dock. If you want to get to the other side of the problem, you must cut the rope that’s holding you to the dock.
Soon you’ll begin to see signs that you’re on your way to success. Don’t stop what you’re doing and look around all day for such signs. You WILL see them. Ideas will come to you. You’ll have strange urges to take action by calling someone, writing a letter, sending an email. This is the “still, small voice” speaking to you.
Your problems are not more powerful than you are. You have the key to success. It is your birthright. No one can ever take it away from you. Be still and know who you are. Be calm and feel the countless tides of the centuries running through your mind. Know that you’re unique and that there is not another human being on this earth that has the combination of talents and abilities you have. You are as valid as the sun and the stars.
As Commander Spock would say…”Live long and prosper.”
Whether you are aware of it or not, we all have self-talk. You know that little voice inside your head that builds you up or tears you down? I don’t even think that I noticed it until my early 20s. The self-talk voice had been with me my entire life, but I never realized it was even there. So when I discovered it, I was quite upset about all of the negativity that came with it. I had these negative self-talk tapes playing over and over in my mind. The scariest part was that I had no idea how to stop the tape. So I started to do some work. It didn’t happen over night, but eventually I learned how to allow the negative voice to say what it says and not pay it any attention.
I try to listen to the positive self-talk these days. The negative self-talk has no value and is extremely draining. Fear is what fuels the fire which powers the intensity of the negative self-talk flame. You don’t have to give power to that fear! Instead, try to focus on and accept the positive self-talk. It might feel awkward at first, but it will get easier. The more you focus on the positive, the more positivity you will create in your life. It has been said that your thoughts become things. I believe we manifest the ones that we hold onto and give the most power to. So give your power to the positive ones.
Are you focusing on positive or negative self-talk?